Why FIL worries me

I try to get along with my FIL ~ until he pulls crap like telling me he'll take custody & I'll get visitation of my daughter.

Hubs' father worries me for several reasons.

1. He has money. And I don't mean just more money than us ~ I mean the $,$$$,$$$ kind of money. The kind of money that makes an ass of a human being popular and beloved. The kind of money that makes a daughter who hates her father (and has said so to his face several times) turn around afterward and beg for forgiveness so that she's not cut out of the will.

2. When ESIL & EBIL have problems (every few years they threaten divorce) he offers to move her & the kids away to where EBIL can't find them - because they are "his" grandkids & he'll be damned if they are raised around EBIL's parents. ( Who are perfectly normal & lovely people) He's hired PI's on several occasions to nose out information on EBIL - just in case ESIL wants a reason to leave. They never found anything, and FIL thinks they were crappy investigators because "there had to be something going on."

3. He thinks there had to be something going on because he cheated right, left, and sideways on his wife of 28 years. He still doesn't think he did anything wrong.

4. He has anger management issues - he and the EvilStepMonster have had each other arrested ... 3? times now for domestic abuse/violence. They drop the charges the next day when they calm down.

5. He can't stand my parents (for no reason he's stated, just doesn't like them) and had a shit-fit the one time Hubs & I mentioned moving closer to them .... my dad only has Stage4 Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma & is going through treatments & surgery. I have his only grandchild. There's no reason we should live closer to them then the 12 hour drive we have currently.

6. He bad mouths Hubs on a regular basis & then doesn't understand why they have a strained relationship.

7. He thinks he wants to be a pastor (I almost choked on my bubble gum when he told Hubs that one)

8. He beat his wife & kids for years. Y E A R S. Beat. Children.

9. He has never treated women with true respect - he placates them and keeps the attitude that as "the man" he knows best.

10. He doesn't respect me or Hubs.

I have no doubt that if something was ever to happen to Hubs he would spend BIG money to keep me from being able to leave this state & take Princess away. Hubs already knows if he was to die that I would move farther north, I am only staying here for him. What he doesn't know is that if there was a divorce I would do the same thing. In this state a judge will not stop the custodial parent from moving out of state if they can show that they are doing it to provide a better life for the child (better job, better housing, or better education). But FIL would tie me up in court for MONTHS to keep that from happening & I don't have the money to fight him ... and I know that FIL would think nothing of calling DCFS & making my life a living hell. There would be nothing for them to find ~ but I know from watching friends that they don't stop at just one visit -- and when you involve them with a custody battle the judge will plop the kids with the grandparents until it can all be sorted out (we had this happen to our good friends a few years ago).

I just don't trust FIL as far as I can throw him ...

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Hubs & I discussed the family crap today ~ he actually said he would be perfectly happy not to see them again any time soon. He likes the idea of seeing them like we do my family ~ twice a year for a few days at a time & 4 months notice to prepare. I offered to call real estate agents outside of an 8 hour driving radius. He didn't say no!! I think we may be on a good step to getting us OUT OF THIS STATE!