If you don't know me by now

My dearest darling husband,

I love you more than life itself, you are my best friend, biggest cheerleader and personal comedy show. You are also one of the 4 biggest pains in my ass, but you do laundry and move furniture for me ~ I let a lot of things slide in exchange for that.

I love that our sex life has picked up greatly in the last several weeks ~ I will never complain about that. But we need to get one thing straight ok? The candy shop closes at 2am & does not reopen until 10am. Don't ever ~ ever, ever, ever come knocking at 6:15AM again.

I realize that this rule has never been stated in our marriage before & I understand any confusion you may have ~ but we didn't go to bed until 3am (Guitar Hero is fun, but we can't keep doing that!) and then to be woken up 3 hours later is just ... rude. I cannot be expected to be a willing and joyful participant when I am in the throws of REM sleep.

The next time your friend wants to play after 2am you need to take him on a walk, or whatever it is you do to help him sleep again ~ because I will be sleeping thankyouverymuch.

Love,
Your adoring wife